Friday, February 14, 2014

Valentines Day, 2014

I've mentioned the Pulitzer Prize-winning scientist and author, Douglas R. Hofstadter, several times in this blog.
File:Le Ton beau de
We especially liked (and concurred with) Hofstadter's theory that when two people love each other and closely share their hopes and aspirations over many years, a sort of mind meld takes place, where one sees through the eyes of the other, a condition that even transcends death.  In Ton Beau De Marot, Hofstadter illustrates that theory with his own experiences and reflections after the death of his beloved wife, Carol.

In a later book, Hofstadter expresses his amazement that other scientists did not take on this premise, as if they considered it simply sentimental rather than what actually happens.

It doesn't happen to everyone, of course.  Not everyone is capable.  My posts on other Valentine Days (for instance, at this link) have usually been about the lack of genuine love in this materialistic American society.

There are individuals who carry an infectious sense of love and caring around with them.  They seem always in a good mood, never a bad word to say.  My own wife, spreading good cheer wherever she went, was that rare sort of person.  This is my first Valentines Day since her death, a mere thirty days ago.

But she is still with me and with everyone who knew her, for to know her was to partake of that special sunshine which touched on the eternal.

As Hofstadter argued, love can be like a magic mind meld so that a part of her assumes a transformative place in my own mind.  I look, I listen, and she sees and hears too.  Seleta is still with me on this consciously spiritual level.  She remains the very best part of me.  Still here right now.


  1. Richard,
    My condolences on your loss.

  2. Oh Richard, I am so sorry. I feel like the things you shared about your life...have given me the sense that I sort of know you...and a little bit like I knew your wife.

    You are such an aspiring person...and some of the best books I've read have been ones you wrote about here or online in general. For what it's worth, please know I am thinking of you and your strong spirit and attitude during this time is of great value and insight to me.

    I don't really know what to say, except thank you for sharing. This and so many things


  3. Richard, Candy told me about your loss. I've been a lurking reader of your blog and a regular correspondent at the McCarthy Forum and, even though you rarely went into details, it was clear from the regular use of "we" in your posts that there was a partner in your life who shared many of your passions. My sincerest condolences at your loss. Keep sharing your discoveries and thoughts with us, even if "I" is lonelier than "we". I'*m sure she would have wanted it that way.

  4. Richard, Candy also let me know of this sad news. Sorry you are going through this.
    --Peter Weber (Glass from CM Forum)

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  6. Thank you for this excellent post and this wonderful blog. Best wishes.

  7. Hello Richard, Wondering how you are doing. just checking in here to say hello. Thinking of you, Candy

  8. The blog are the best that is extremely useful to keep.


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